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Yom
Kippur
-
Kol Nidre
September 21,
2007
Something
happened in this Sanctuary this past year that surprised
me in a wonderfully enjoyable way. It was a first in all
of the years I have been teaching and speaking from this
Bimah.
It was a bit of a dream come true that
night. I have from time to time dreamed of what it might
be like to give a speech at a political convention when
the crowd applauds wildly after every other sentence or to
be a preacher in an African American church where the
congregation engages in a duet with the preacher with an
ongoing refrain of Amens or I’m with you brother. We
could try it here but it won’t work. It’s not in us. We
are more restrained in the synagogue. The most I can hope
for is the hushed silence of attention in the congregation
and two open eyes for almost every one seated in the
synagogue and when I hear the hush and see your eyes
focused I am very grateful, truly grateful. One long time
congregant wanted to tell me how deeply meaningful he
found my sermon on the first day of Rosh Hashanah. His
compliment began, “Rabbi, I usually doze off at some point
while you’re speaking.... but this sermon kept me awake.”
What could I say I was so touched. One of the sweetest
sounds that I have come to know over the years is the
sound of your laughter. I believe there is holiness in our
laughter but otherwise we remain restrained and when I end
my talk and I can only hope that you end at the same
time I end rather than five minutes earlier, the only
sound to then break the silence is my own voice saying
something deeply profound like “We now continue the
service on.....” But it was different that night. When I
finished speaking there was a spontaneous burst of
applause that was heartening and memorable. It was the
topic I addressed and the position I took on the topic
that drew the response from those seated in this
Sanctuary.
The context of the evening was the
annual Jewish community Kallah, an evening of Judaic
learning sponsored by the Federation. The scene was a
panel discussion of four Rabbis seated here on the Bimah
and some 250 plus people seated throughout the
synagogue. We each had our own topic to address. My topic
was A Jewish View on Homosexuality. I want to speak to
that topic tonight but not to that topic alone. In
speaking to this topic I want to address what I hope is
and will be the spirit of Ohev Shalom in a larger sense
and the evolving spirit of Conservative Judaism.
This past December, the Committee on
Jewish Law and Standards of the Rabbinical Assembly, the
international organization of Rabbis of the Conservative
Movement voted in favor of a paper that would pave the way
for Jewish gay men and women, otherwise qualified, to be
accepted to our Rabbinical and Cantorial Schools. The
Conservative Movement would thus join the
Reconstructionist and Reform Movements in a more open,
embracing and inclusive stance.
I read and studied the scholarly papers
produced by the Law committee and I searched my own heart
and mind for my own position on this matter.
Over the years, some young people who
have grown up in Ohev Shalom have “come out” to me. One
young lady did so over a period of some ten e-mails each
time ever so gently testing the waters of my reaction
until she felt it was safe to tell her Rabbi and she
trusted that I would be understanding and accepting.
Some of our young people who had been amongst our most
active and committed in Jewish life and had gone off to
the most Judaically oriented college programs later shared
with me they are gay. Being gay and deeply Jewishly
committed are not mutually exclusive unless we choose to
actively exclude. That young lady asked me at the time if
I would publicly address this issue because it would make
a world of difference for her and for other young people
she knew. If too many years have gone by since she asked
me, I am sorry and I hope it is not too late. The events
of this past year in our movement bring me to address this
topic tonight.
Wherever possible, I believe religion,
Judaism and our synagogue should be inclusive rather than
exclusive. We should work to draw in rather than keep out.
There is no one model congregant of Ohev Shalom. We are
enriched by our diversity. From our earliest years, I have
said that whatever our level of Jewish observance and
whatever our level of Jewish educational background the
doors of Ohev Shalom are open. From our largest donor to
the individual in need of our greatest support and caring,
the doors of our synagogue are open. From the Jewish -
Jewish married couple to the interfaith couple who is
committed to raising a Jewish family and contributing to
the future of the Jewish people, the doors of our
synagogue are open. Not only are our doors open for each
and every one of you to enter but we need to be even more
welcoming and embracing to let you know how valued and
appreciated you are here. Life is not easy out there and
that’s why we have in here. Our purpose in being is to
make life more loving, caring, supportive, accepting in
here. That is what religion ought to do. That is what
Judaism ought to do. That is what our synagogue ought to
do.
I don’t believe anything Judaism will
do or any religion will say will change anyone’s sexual
orientation. One doesn’t choose one’s sexual orientation,
one discovers it and once discovered it is virtually
impossible to change it. We can make people feel
rejected, unwanted and alienated or we can be open and
welcoming and make people feel accepted, valued and
embraced. I choose to open my arms rather than turn my
back.
I believe Judaism should wish the same
for a same sex relationship that we want for a
heterosexual relationship - that it be loving, long term,
exclusive, and committed. It should in fact involve a
public Jewish ceremony so that the union is recognized by
the family, friends and community and will in fact lead to
a functioning Jewish family. I therefore am in favor of
rabbinic officiation at a sacred union between two Jewish
gay individuals committed to spending their lives together
and creating a Jewish home. If I am ever called on to
officiate at such a union of a young person who stood on
this Bimah as a Bar or Bat Mitzvah or was my student in my
Confirmation Class and they have chosen to share their
life with another Jewish individual of the same sex, I
will joyfully stand with them at a sacred ceremony. It
may feel somewhat strange, I confess but I believe it will
be the right thing to do and it will feel more right than
it will feel strange. When white people first sat next to
African Americans on the front of the bus it may have felt
strange but it was right.
The Teshuvah-- Responsum of the Law
Committee to the Paper read “This ruling effectively
normalizes the status of gay and lesbian Jews in the
Jewish community. Furthermore gay or lesbian Jews who
demonstrate the depth of Jewish commitment knowledge faith
and desire to serve as Rabbis, Cantors and educators shall
be welcomed to apply to our professional schools and
associations.” Only twenty some years ago, many
Conservative Jews said they could not imagine looking up
at the Bimah and seeing a woman standing there as Rabbi or
Cantor . Well now they can and they do and we are better
off for it.
The applause that night reflected the
fact that this position of acceptance is where the great
majority of the Jewish community in America stands and
they so greatly appreciate hearing this acceptance from
their Religious leaders. My colleagues on the Bimah were
all in agreement.
The numbers.
We need to do more outreach and let people who do not fit
into a particular mold know that they are welcome in Ohev
Shalom, be they gay, straight, interfaith couples and
interfaith families, singles, widows, divorced,
financially well off, financially struggling. They say
that the older you get the more you become set in your
ways. The older I get, and today I am one year older, the
more sympathetic and accepting I find myself to people's
life situations and I want to welcome them here, not
exclude them. I want to be open and welcoming to everyone
who wants to join me and join us in creating a Jewish
future, in living a Jewish life, in creating the next
Jewish generation.
.
Let us find ways to be open rather than closed. Let us
find ways to include rather than reject. Let us find ways
to embrace rather than exclude. Let us find ways to be
welcoming to all who come to our doors in search. The word
I intend to use more than any other this coming year is
Welcome. In Hebrew ברוך הבא Welcome to Ohev Shalom.
Amen
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